Mental roadblocks can keep you from achieving the results you want.
Sometimes I just want to be able to drink without consequences, eat anything and everything I want, and still be super lean and shredded.
I mean, c’mon, is that too much to ask?!
There are moments when I question if it’s worth it. The dedication and commitment to being fit. To looking a certain way.
We can try to convince ourselves that it’s really about health, but let’s be honest …
We want to look good.
And there’s nothing wrong with that.
Of course, we want to be healthy as well, but I have to imagine we visualize the perfect physical body more than we visualize the perfect bloodwork.
Sometimes this process can feel mentally exhausting.
Especially when you’ve been at it for so long. When you’ve tried so many times to lose weight. When you’ve cycled between “all-in” and “fuck-it” mode.
I know the feeling all too well.
It’s the mental roadblocks that keep us stuck.
It’s that little voice inside our brains that says we’re not doing enough, we’re not working hard enough, we’re not making progress fast enough.
And the moment we slip up, that voice loves to call us out. Here we go again. Same old story with you. Another failure. You might as well quit.
Here are 10 mental roadblocks that are keeping you stuck:
1. You still view this as an “on or off” game. What program should I be on? What diet should I do?
None. Because that assumes there’s an end point, which there isn’t. Once you decide that you want lifelong results, it’s time to accept that it’s a lifelong pursuit.
There’s no “on or off.” There’s simply refinement, learning, and adjusting.
2. You operate as if there’s a hidden contract for your actions.
You say you want to “make it a lifestyle” and yet … it sure seems like those lifestyle actions are conditional. If you’re seeing progress and the scale is moving down … you treat it like a lifestyle.
But what happens when the results aren’t there? All of a sudden it’s no longer worth doing.
Remove the conditions. Take the action steps because you know they’re important. Not because there’s some hidden contract that promises you a specific outcome if you do certain things.
3. You want there to be a finish line. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could just sprint to the finish line and the work just stopped?
Unfortunately, that’s how most people approach this process. Sure, I’ll do that 30 day cleanse. I’ll try that 75 day “mental” challenge.
And then what?
Then you default back to your behaviors prior to the cleanse or the challenge because the finish line wasn’t real. And you learned nothing about sustainable behavior change.
4. You hold onto an identity or narrative that keeps you stuck.
This is one of the mental roadblocks that is way too common. Your internal dialogue is telling you that you’re not good enough. You’re not able to be successful or you’re not worthy.
So when your actions start to change and you finally start prioritizing yourself …
Your brain pulls you right back down to confirm your internal beliefs.
You’ll always sabotage yourself if you don’t re-write that story you believe about yourself.
5. You judge yourself when you’re not perfect.
Perfectionism is a coping mechanism. You view mistakes as unacceptable and it probably traces back to childhood. At some point you learned that it’s not ok to make mistakes and if you make one, you’re a disappointment to yourself and others.
This is one of those mental roadblocks that often manifests by being overly meticulous with your nutrition and feeling like you have to do everything “right” each day. The tiniest deviation and you feel like everything is ruined.
It can also manifest in procrastination. Subconsciously you know your own standards so you might lean on excuses like “it’s not the right time.”
Interpretation = not the right time means I don’t believe I can be perfect so I’m not going to start at all.
6. You haven’t dealt with the emotions of change.
Our brains resist change. It goes deeper than that. Your brain will create scenarios that are completely fabricated that conjure up feelings of fear and uncertainty.
Why? So you remain in your current situation.
It’s a survival mechanism. However, staying the same is slowly killing you.
So you have to emotionally process the feelings of change.
If you don’t, you’ll sabotage yourself when you or others notice the change that is happening. You start getting compliments when you haven’t before and the emotional reaction of fear and anxiety hits … so you sabotage yourself without knowing why.
You have to anticipate and feel the feelings before it actually happens. Almost like a dress rehearsal for the change you’re about to create.
7. You lack patience and have a hard time delaying gratification.
Your espoused values (what you say you want) are often misaligned with your values in action (what you do). Often times, it’s because you haven’t done any future self work and quickly lose sight of the long term gains that you’re hoping to achieve.
The decision you made in the moment was what you wanted most. Until you figure out a way for the long term gain to be what you want most, you’ll always struggle with giving in to temptation.
8. You constantly look for external blame because taking ownership is uncomfortable.
It’s always something … your kids, your schedule, your financial situation, your hormones, your genetics, your coach.
Deflect, deflect, deflect.
Even the people who say things like … “I’m my own worst enemy but I just can’t seem to get out of my own way.”
That’s a classic defense mechanism of coming across as taking ownership but not actually doing it.
It’s still positioning yourself as the victim to yourself.
When you fully and truly own it … your actions will quickly change.
9. You sabotage as a means of control.
If I jump into the unknown … who knows what’s going to happen?! It’s scary. And unpredictable.
If I sabotage … I’m in control. I know exactly why I keep failing and it’s certain and predictable.
“Most prefer the certainty of misery to the misery of uncertainty.” – Virginia Satir
10. You avoid getting the help you truly need.
It’s not that you think you “should” be able to figure it out on your own.
It’s that you know if you truly ask for help … shit gets real.
Real change is going to happen. And once again, that’s scary. So your brain tries to manipulate you with things like … “I know what to do, I’m just not doing it. I don’t need someone to tell me what I already know.”
Or “I can’t afford to invest in a coach. It’s too expensive.” Meanwhile, you’ll cumulatively spend significantly more on fads, supplements, or other expenses that are lower on your priority list by your own standards.
So there you have it.
Which one of these mental roadblocks do you struggle with the most?