Change the frame and you can change your results.
There are so many things that are out of our control in life.
Today, you wake up and you can’t control the weather. You can’t control the other drivers on the road on your way to work and you can’t control what your boss or co-workers are going to do. You can’t control any randomness that may occur throughout the day.
Even when it comes to your health and fitness … you can’t control your genetics. You can’t control the exact number on the scale each day. And, you can’t control if your gym decides to close or if your spouse wants to keep a bunch of candy in the house.
The one thing that drives your results more than anything else is …
Your ability to control the frame.
When you control the frame, you control the outcome.
When I say “the frame,” I’m basically referring to the lens through which you see the situation. Or your perception.
Here’s an example of frame control gone wrong.
We had our team call on Tuesday this week and there was a conversation around one of our clients who is struggling to stay consistent over the weekends.
She’s crushing it all week and you can see her progress happening every Monday through Friday. Then, it all unravels every weekend and the cycle keeps repeating itself.
She’s very aware of it and frustrated by it.
Fortunately, she has an amazing coach (Coach Liz) who is asking all the right questions.
At the root of her weekend indulgences are feelings of comparison and sacrifice.
First, she compares herself to her friends and family who drink a lot and eat whatever they want each weekend. Especially her sister who she sees eating and drinking while still remaining lean.
Second, she feels like she’s sacrificing a lot already to make progress and having to continue that sacrifice seems like too much.
That’s her frame and that’s her perception. That’s the lens through which she views the situation.
Now … her frame / perception becomes her belief, her belief becomes her thoughts and feelings. Her thoughts and feelings become her decisions and actions, and her decisions and actions become her results.
So how do we change the outcome?
We change the frame.
Make no mistake about it … your frame is a choice and it is 100% within your control.
Again, there are so many things that are out of our control. But, it’s important that we don’t give away control over things that we actually can control.
She can change the frame around comparison. She can be aware of her tendency to compare and sit with that feeling. Consider what it is that she’s really comparing to.
Maybe it’s because she’s envious of her sister’s ability to drink and stay lean.
Ok cool, so what is the frame that will be most productive here? How about … my sister may have sacrificed a lot to get to this point or my sister has a different metabolism than I do. My sister might be overly restrictive every week and then drinks on the weekend so her pattern might not even be that healthy.
How about the sacrifice frame?
Instead of viewing her decisions as sacrifices, she can change the frame to something more productive. Like … this isn’t a sacrifice, it’s an active choice to move me closer to the things I want.
The real sacrifice is my health if I continue to avoid the things that I know make me feel my best. So I’d rather make decisions that support my goals vs. decisions that sacrifice my health.
Now, from that new frame we have a new perception. New beliefs, new thoughts and feelings, new decisions and actions, and new results.
Let’s do one more example.
You can change the frame around exercising or going to the gym.
A lot of people who want to start lifting weights avoid the gym because they are intimidated or afraid.
That’s the frame they are choosing.
The gym is scary and intimidating – perception
I can’t go to the gym because I don’t belong and don’t know what I’m doing – belief
Fear / paralysis – thoughts and feelings
I’m not going to the gym – decision and action
No change in habits / body composition – results
Let’s change the frame.
The gym is new to me and going to a new place is always a little bit scary. What are some other examples in my life where I had to step into an unknown place?
The first day of school. I was always nervous on the first day of school but it got better very quickly. I met people and became familiar with my school after only a couple of weeks.
My first day at a new job. I didn’t know what to expect but I picked things up pretty quickly.
I actually have a lot of proof that going to a new place always ends up totally fine in the end. I’m sure it’ll be uncomfortable at first but I know it’ll get better over time.
Change the frame and it will change your thoughts, feelings, decisions, and RESULTS.
The gym is new and makes me nervous but I know it’ll get better over time – new perception
I can go to the gym because I’ve been in this situation before in other ways throughout my life and it ended up totally fine – new belief
Nervous / excited / ready to get the initial awkwardness out of the way – new thoughts and feelings
I’m going to the gym – new decision and action
Habit implemented / body composition changes / increased confidence – new results
Boom. Change the frame and you can change your results.
The mistake we often make is assuming that our initial frame / perception / thoughts / feelings around a certain thing is automatically the one we need to stick with.
Very rarely is it rooted in truth.
Unfortunately, the first frame is usually intended to keep you stuck. Because your brain wants you in a predictable and safe situation. And there is nothing more predictable than staying in the same patterns that you’ve always stayed in.
That’s part of the reason why people continue to do things that don’t serve them. Like remaining in a toxic relationship.
Once it becomes known and predictable, your brain will try to keep you there.
Even the process of taking the necessary step to get the help you need to achieve the body you desire with total food freedom through the process.
It’s always one simple step away.
And yet, the frame you choose is often one about timing – it’s not the right time.
Ability – I can’t be successful.
Dwelling – I tried in the past and it didn’t work.
Finances – I can’t afford it.
If you continue to hold onto those frames, you’ll continue to get the results you’ve always gotten.
Change the frame and you can change the outcome.
Timing – There will never be a right time and every minute I wait is another minute I waste where I could be making progress.
Ability – I have proof in my ability to do difficult things, as I have plenty of examples throughout my life.
Dwelling – My past doesn’t define me. Each failure was an opportunity to learn and grow. Each failure takes me one step closer to success.
Finances – I can’t afford not to. An investment in myself will always pay dividends. And I’m likely spending that money elsewhere or going to spend it elsewhere on something not as important as my health and well-being.
Boom. Change the frame and you can immediately change the outcome.
It takes practice.
So let’s get to work :).
